A heavy heart, a hopeful heart

I had an amazing night last night! We celebrated my 30th birthday with a “Bid Adieu to my Roaring 20s” themed party. I asked my family and friends to dress up as people from the 20s, we played songs from the 20s and my husband hosted a bar of 20s cocktails. It was so much fun!


But today, I found myself feeling unexpectedly blue. Not because I’m thirty. Not because my party was over. But for a reason that has been breaking my heart and I have been hesitant to share.

I have my masters in Education and for the past three years, I have had my own classroom. I love teaching. It is a passion of mine and something I have felt called to do. Unfortunately, I had to close the door on several teaching opportunities the past two years and I did not feel God was telling me to go back to my current job this year. So for the first time in four years, I have not been busy prepping lesson plans, decorating and setting up a classroom and feeling those nervous/excited jitters that come with a new year. And it has been a tough transition, to be sure.

But I have steadfastly said over the last few years, “God withholds no good thing.” I have to believe that even now, when I feel so unsure and honestly, disappointed.

In the midst of me feeling this sorrow, I am choosing to be hopeful. I am choosing to live expectantly. And the thing that has been so beautiful is the way God keeps using unexpected things to remind me that He truly sees me and has a plan for my life.

I wanted to share pictures of some of the cards and gifts I received last night that spoke to my heart:


How blessed I am to have friends and family who see me on this journey and desire to encourage me along the way!

Finally, the verse of the day on my YouVersion app was one I had highlighted a while back and felt was picked just for me today:

“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭15:13‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I pray that for each of you tonight. May we not grow weary in the process, but cling to the one who knows our hearts better than we know them ourselves.



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